politician will not survive this

Attention Citizens of Nigeria.....Some Nigerian governors and Ministerrs have been kidnaped and the amout of 850 million Naira is being requested for or they will be burned alive with fuel...Please donate generously for the good of our nation. Me i've donated 4000 litres of fuel..LOL

jamb is a big problem

A MUST READ JOKE
Boy: Uncle, I learnt its difficult to get admission into University these days, except you are well connected…
Uncle: Yes thats true. …
...

Boy: Since you are connected, I came to ask you to help me get admission into university after my jamb. Uncle: Ya that’s true…am connected and I will help you.
Boy: Thank you uncle.
Uncle: You are welcome, so how is your result, is it Waec or Neco and how many credits did you get?
Boy: Uncle, its waec, I had only 2 credits in Agricultural science and Yoruba language, but I failed the rest.
Uncle: Well, that’s not bad,you can still be a doctor, not a medical doctor really, but native doctor (babalawo)..you will use your credit in Agric in collecting herbs from forest, and Yoruba language for incantations.

biology exam

During a Biology exam, the first question was: “Draw the female reproductive organ.
” As the exam was progressing, Ehis saw Obehi bending down to look between her legs,
so Ehis raised his hands and shouted at the top of his lungs, “Sir, Obehi is copying from the original!”

black wahala

Blackberry don chop my money tire, na im I come vex yestaday sell am, come take some money buy China phone!
Now am in bigger trouble!!!
1. E go full after 3 minutes of charging.
...

2. The phone get TV, Touch screen, Nail cutter, Firelighter etc.
3. I fit write Text message with a toothpick sef.
4. The spelling get mistakes e.g NokLa, blackderry, i-porn, samswag etc.
5. When aeroplane pass e go record "One missed Call".
6. When a big truck horn; e go show "Charger connected".
7. When Chinese man pass e go show: "One Bluetooth device found".
8. When fine gal waka pass, e go show "Ur favourite food found".
9. When ugly gal waka pass, e go show, "Virus detected".
Abeg I wan sell am! Who wan buy ooo?
Even as I dey find buyer, e dey show me for screen:
no contact found

akpos printing press

Be careful who prints your wedding programme. Akpos, who was printing a wedding programme was asked to put 1 John 4:18 in the programme but he made a mistake and Instead printed John 4:18. 1 John 4:18 says, “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear; because fear has torment. He that fears is not made perfect in love” John 4:18 reads, “For you have had five husbands, and he whom you now have is not your husband…

akpos printing press

Be careful who prints your wedding programme. Akpos, who was printing a wedding programme was asked to put 1 John 4:18 in the programme but he made a mistake and Instead printed John 4:18. 1 John 4:18 says, “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear; because fear has torment. He that fears is not made perfect in love” John 4:18 reads, “For you have had five husbands, and he whom you now have is not your husband…